i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i want to swaddle you in tequila
There r osticjed everywhere
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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