I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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