How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
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