You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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