ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Randomize