Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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