would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
