Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize