I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I just found a bag of teeth...
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
