I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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