Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
