VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
