The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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