yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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