He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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