the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
