Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize