Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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