im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
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