i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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