Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize