Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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