mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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