She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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