i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
