All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
