found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
