i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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