so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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