i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
