Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
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