let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
