i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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