ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
