how can u be prego again
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
