Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
organizing the empties. That sober.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize