I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
