i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
