Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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