Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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