got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Ladies don't puke and tell
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize
