Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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