What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
