Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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