She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
