i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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