lets start a swedish sibling band together
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Randomize
