Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
