I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
