how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
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