My brain says no but my pants say off.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
