these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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