the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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