This dress was meant to end up on your floor
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
